Today is the beginning, in our neck of the woods, of college basketball season.  What this means for UPH:

• Heckling. One of the best parts of small-time DI sports is the simple fact that you actually get to TALK to the other team.  And scare them.  And mock them for arbitrary things, like receding hairlines.  And, when you’re losing so badly it’s just funny, pick a random member of the other team and start cheering for him.  Last year, we also got a disgruntled member of a nameless team to rank his (fairly well-known) coach on a scale of 1-5 by holding up fingers.  Dude gave him a three.

• Sore Throats: See above. It takes dedication.

• Dance Team Antics: Some teams are good, and some are not.  But they ALL wear spandex.  Sure, we’re chicks in here.  Doesn’t mean we can’t appreciate us some spandex doing some high kicks in perfect unison.  Sue us.

• Man vs. Zone: Quick, which defense does your favorite team run?  You can tell you have an effective team when you can tell the difference between defenses.  Good luck!

• Basketball Shoes: UCF recently lost their sponsorship deal with adidas because freshman Marcus Jordan wore his dad’s shoes.  Air Jordans, to be exact.  We still think there should be some sort of clause about that…

• Showboating: Yup, you, my friend, are an exceedingly large individual.  Do you really think it’s a good idea to put your entire body weight on that teeny tiny hoop? You do? Hm. Good luck with that.

• Flops: Because a sixty pound midget wouldn’t have fallen over that hard from being touched that lightly.

• Free Throws: Free points! Everyone loves points.  Ooooh, just off the rim…

What do you love about the beginning of basketball season?